What to do if the university is already infuriating and you don’t see the future in it 💁♀️
So, in a hurry, you chose your future specialty and suddenly realized that you had made a serious mistake. Or I entered a local university and realized that you want to go to another. Or you just can’t get out of bed in the morning and go to these hated couples.
All this is absolutely normal. You don’t have to go through with a task that only brings you suffering and frustration, even if it is a “compulsory” college degree. However, changing college or quitting altogether is not the same as turning off a boring movie. It is necessary to think over the decision, weigh the options, think over a plan of action for the future. We tell you what to do if you have just started to study, and everything is already infuriating 😥
1. Let yourself get used to
When life changes, the body, and especially the nervous system experience stress. Even if you entered the university of your dreams, new conditions, people, classes are still global changes in your usual routine. The body and brain go through a period of adaptation that lasts from two weeks to several months.
At this time, you may feel anxiety, mood swings, a desire to return “everything as it was before.” This is a normal process that must be lived and experienced. You are not alone in this situation: everyone, from cleaning ladies to teachers, is worried and wants their adaptation period to end as soon as possible.
What can be done? It is important at this time to slowly and without violence acquaint oneself with new circumstances – to attend clubs and parties, to participate in lectures and seminars. It is important to remember that you are not your specialty and not your university. You remain the same, only the conditions have changed. To ground yourself and return to yourself, try meditating, playing sports, or keeping a journal.
2. Talk to a psychologist
Seeking professional help is normal: articles on the Internet will give only general recommendations, but only a specially trained person can specifically deal with your situation.
Universities often have career counselors or staff psychologists. Every year at the end of September, crowds of freshmen come to them, who are disappointed in their future specialty, you are not alone.
However, if a psychologist from a university begins to covertly or openly press, convincing that everything is fine and must stay, it is better to resort to the help of paid specialists.
3. Make sure that you don’t like the specialty, not the teachers
The interest of students in the subject is highly dependent on the professionalism, tact, and interest of the teacher. It happens that students fall in love with a boring subject thanks to a gifted teacher, but, unfortunately, it often happens the other way around.
To understand that the problem is in a boring professor, try to be like the same lectures from another teacher or watch them on YouTube. It will be sad to let go of an interesting specialty, just because someone is mumbling lectures from a piece of paper.
Once you understand that it’s a matter of teaching, not desire, reduce the percentage of annoying lectures. We do not recommend skipping, it is better to find additional classes with a teacher who is passionate about his work.Sourcegiphy.com
4. Talk to your parents and get support
The most difficult point, especially for those who study on a paid basis. Most likely you are dependent on them financially or emotionally, and therefore they have the right to know about your doubts.
It is worth speaking honestly, but not dramatizing, be sure to reinforce the “negative” news with positive ones. For example, you might say that you are still fascinated by the profession, but do not like the university, or that the university is good, but you cannot keep up with the pace of work. Tell them that you are very scared and ask for your support.
If your parents do not want to accept your decision in any way, weigh the pros and cons. Think about whether they will stop providing for you if you decide to go your own way, and if you can then provide for yourself on your own. Sometimes freedom is worth the risk, but not always – start from your conditions, there are no right answers.
Once you have made a firm decision, communicate it to your parents calmly and confidently. If they don’t accept it, ask for support from other people: friends, a psychologist, classmates.
5. Find a reason to stay if leaving is not an option
Unfortunately, you cannot always just quit your unloved university and do what you like. Perhaps you are still supported by your parents or you need a scholarship. Perhaps you do not want to go into the unknown, and there are still six months before retaking the exam.
This time you can devote to getting to know yourself and your aspirations better. Since there is nothing to lose, try yourself in different things: student creativity, self-management, hard study, and crazy parties. Find what you like and draw strength and inspiration from there to continue your studies.
6. Don’t blame yourself: you did exactly what you could
Not everything in life happens the way we want it to. It happens that you have to graduate from a hated university, go to stupid couples and listen to insults from teachers. At any moment of this journey, remember that the university is a small part of your huge life, which will still be wonderful and inspiring.
Of course, try to transfer, find advantages in training or change specialty, but if nothing like this happens, just admit that you did your best. It’s time to let go of the situation. Instead of worrying about a place that you won’t see in a couple of years, redirect your energy into a more efficient channel: take care of your health, take up a hobby, become financially and mentally mature.